I decided to blog today, so i can let go of my inhibitions.

I don't think i have been on a hiatus of writing about myself or anything at all. And here I am today typing away on an entry which i think is one of the most important aspects in my discovery of self (which in fact has not yet ended; i thought it had). Lately I have been very intrigued with the word everybody knows - bucket list. So many people's bucket list involve of them going for a travel to somewhere exotic, or somewhere that poses a lot of challenges for them to encounter. And at a deep pondering of this association of people's wishlists (could be another name for bucket list in my humble opinion), I wonder what is my bucket list? Do I even have one? 

Now comes the more serious thought - do I have anything I wish to do ahead of my time now? I am so sure then that people without a bucket list are people who have no whatsoever desires for improvement/betterment in their lives. For once I considered myself to be one of them. 

As i continued to think of this from a different perspective, i in fact do have a bucket list, only that mine is slightly unique from the mainstream (i don't think i'm the only one out there in the WWW). 

I have always thought my life would turn out great just like all the films I've seen in TV and cinemas. But came that day that shattered my dreams, but mostly my self- esteem, and I was definitely scarred for good. To accept that reality is utmost importance for me; to be able to convey that  to the people around me without feeling pity for myself is new found strength. I want to be normal, and I am. All i had to do was to accept what is there.

That's first on my bucket list. To achieve self-acceptance of my scarred self. What would be the second one?

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(still thinking)